My father is so stubborn. I don't know why I call him my father, to be honest. He spends "his" money on his own needs and my brothers and sisters who can support themselves. He spends all "his" money on business failures and failed ideas for businesses, when all the money is supposed to be for my college fund. I have one year left of high school and I have no money value for a college fund, because "school in America is easy to get into and easy to achieve". He just doesn't fucking get it. For four years, I failed because of him. In pity. Let's just say it's a Willy and Biff Loman, but instead of Willy cheating on his wife, it's cheating his own child.
Next, is the way he sees my mother's side of my family and he looks down on them because of some stupid little drama my uncle and my father had. He can not get the fuck over it and I'm sick and tired of his immaturity of this bullshit. My family forgot about it, and is over it. They invite my family to a family gathering, festivity and such, and he turns all of them down because he simply "has no respect towards them" to go. When I, his own flesh and blood, want to go so I can say I have a REAL family that can look past problems. I frown every time he says no, and he rants about just ONE time, how he used to be the favorite of the family until the drama. Well, gee. I fucking wonder why.
All the emo years I had, when I cared for no one but my friends and friends only, I hated going to the family parties, but he wanted me to go, so I went. Why? Because I wanted him to be happy, and what does he do to repay me?
Spend all 16 years worth of my college fund and no happiness in me, whatsoever.
Because of him, I lost all meaning of family. I don't even know what it stands for.
All I can see is that family means betrayal and hurt.
It's just not fucking worth it anymore.
